


Practice

by highflyer101



Category: Mercy Street (TV)
Genre: Internalized Homophobia, M/M, for a request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-11
Updated: 2016-02-11
Packaged: 2018-05-19 15:54:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5973151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/highflyer101/pseuds/highflyer101
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Aw, Tommy, you're no better than a fine lady when you're drunk, are you? Always needin' me to hold you up?" he teased. His low voice tickled the hair on Tom's neck and sent shivers down his spine. "C'mon, I'll walk you home, you lush." Unsure if he could even string two words together, Tom only laughed in response, vaguely aware of his heart hammering against his rib cage.</p><p>* * * * * <br/>Got a request for an angst Tom/Frank piece. This is the result.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Practice

Tom supposed he'd always known he was different, deep down, but he had been able to avoid it, for the most part, until the night Jimmy Green stole some of his father's whiskey. Before then, Tom was able to kiss Alice without grimacing and look at Frank without feeling his heart clench, but then the alcohol trickled into his system and he felt it rising in his throat like bile, this perverted attraction to his best friend.

 

He knew what the Bible said, like a good southern boy should. He practically memorized the story of Sodom and Gomorrah, hoping against hope that its message would stick each time he read it. It never did, of course, and, with the moonlight illuminating Frank's face as he nursed his share of the whiskey, Tom wondered if there was even a point. He had heard it said that a good life was about finding beauty, and he was sure he could find no greater beauty than the sight in front of him.

Besides, he was sure by now that Frank knew his secret, even if had never addressed it. A kind of shrewd glint entered his eyes every time Tom mentioned Alice, and there was a certain deliberateness to his comments on the subject: he always wondered aloud why Tom wasn't more enthusiastic about their budding courtship, pushed him to compliment her looks. All this was expected, even helpful to Tom's situation. Yet Tom had the distinct feeling that Frank sought to encourage his depravity as much as he disapproved. There was a smirk he got on his face sometimes, and when it appeared he would start leaning over to whisper softy in Tom's ear, his nose brushing against Tom's neck and his lingering on his shoulder unnecessarily long. Occasionally he would even lure him out to the fishing creek at Elk's Horn Run for a friendly swim, beckoning him into the water and tempting him horribly.

"Let's not tell the girls about this," he insisted after Tom stupidly suggested they show Emma and Alice the creek. "It will be our little secret, just like the old days." He paused. "You'd like that, wouldn't you, Tommy?"

That moment had reappeared in Tom's most shameful dreams countless times, yet it was nothing compared to the torture he was subjected to at Jimmy's. The girls weren't present, of course, since there was whiskey involved, so it was just the three boys. Inevitably, Jimmy surrendered to the liquor, and stumbled home, rambling incoherently as he went and leaving Tom and Frank alone. They carried on drinking until they could hardly see straight, pretending that each sip didn't sear their throats on the way down.

The whole of Alexandria seemed dead when they finally started the trek home. They pressed their bodies together for support, struggling to take steps without tripping. They reached the Stringfellows' house first, but as soon as Frank untangled himself, Tom found himself falling through the air, unable to balance. Without missing a beat, Frank yanked him up and pulled him back into his side.

"Aw, Tommy, you're no better than a fine lady when you're drunk, are you? Always needin' me to hold you up?" he teased. His low voice tickled the hair on Tom's neck and sent shivers down his spine. "C'mon, I'll walk you home, you lush." Unsure if he could even string two words together, Tom only laughed in response, vaguely aware of his heart hammering against his rib cage.

They passed the rest of the walk in near silence, occasionally breaking into a fit of giggles when they careened off the path. Each step pushed them closer together until they were practically glued to each other's side. Distantly, Tom knew that this close contact was dangerous for someone like him, that it would only exacerbate his troubles. Yet pulling away seemed impossible, both literally and metaphorically; as they reached his house and attempted to separate, they each tumbled to the ground once more.

"You're as drunk as me, Stringfellow," Tom managed to slur. Frank chuckled.

"Yeah, yeah." Surprisingly, he had the sense to pull himself up on the porch, and, for the second time that night, he hauled Tom up after him. "A fine lady," he repeated. "Can't do anything for yourself, huh?" Tom shoved him halfheartedly, careful not to push him to the ground and start the cycle again.

"You gonna want a kiss good night now, Tommy?" Frank continued. "You'd like that?" Tom opened his mouth, aware that he had to respond but unsure what he would say until -

"For practice," Frank said as closed the gap between them. The messy, barely-there kiss was over before Tom could even appreciate it, yet it was enough to fuel the fire churning in his gut. Whiskey clouding his judgment, he looked greedily for another, but already Frank was staggering away, leaving Tom with nothing to do but fall into bed, hand pressed urgently between his legs, begging himself to think of Alice.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it! As always, I tried my hardest to keep them in character :) 
> 
> Random, but I was kind of going for an Ali/Emily vibe, if anyone watches Pretty Little Liars. It's a horrible show, but there's an interesting dynamic between these two female best friends where Emily is a closeted lesbian and Ali is probably bisexual, but is pretty manipulative and does things like kiss Emily, then tell her it was only practice. Hopefully that sort of toxic aspect got across without making it uncomfortable/gross lol. 
> 
> Comments are always welcome!!!


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